Family

It was a very emotional moment.  My babies were in the nursery so I was able to give our pastor my undivided attention.  His words broke my heart and healed me all at the same time.  At the end of the service yesterday, he spoke to us, his church, about how we had become his family.  He has lost three of his four children, and his remaining daughter will not speak with him.  He didn't speak of how he lost them.  Instead he described a man that was needing a family and needing love and found it in our church.  He described us as his brothers and sisters, as his daughters and sons and his grandchildren.  He voiced how grateful he is to have been led to our church and how much all of us mean to him. Through the tears filling my eyes, I could barely see him.

There are a lot of Sundays that I leave church and my heart, my mind, aren't in the right place.  I sit in church and my mind wanders.  I look around and I see families sitting together and I want that.   I want my husband there beside me.  I want my parents and siblings sharing these moments with me.  I want to be able to pass my baby to family and to grab up those babies that are a part of my family.  I sit in church and realize that most of these people have known each other their entire lives and sometimes I just feel lonely.  Not this Sunday.  This Sunday, I walked out of church with my babies and Brother Bill looks at my girls (after talking about losing his children) and with a huge smile says, "If I had great-grandchildren, I would want them to look just like you girls!"  This Sunday I walked out of church and realized I am the furthest thing from lonely.  There is so much love in our church.  I have family there.

I feel comfortable passing my babies to the members, and I love playing with their babies.  Every Sunday (usually during Children's Church) Eva gives Brother Bill a huge hug.  There's a woman in the choir, I think in her eighties, that told my girls, "Just call me Mamaw Rose, everyone does!"  And she tells them that she loves them often.  If we aren't there, it's noticed.  I have this awesome family at church!  And to top it off, I have an awesome family outside of church too!  Each one of them, no more than a phone call away.  They may not be sitting next to me on Sunday, but they're very much a part of my life.  I'm so blessed, so very blessed with these families and I am just feeling very grateful right now.       

   

The Eyebrow

I know I have already shared this story with several people, but I feel like I need to write it down (type it out, technically) because it's just too good not to remember. 

Anyone who has been around Dad for very long at all has probably, at some point, witnessed, The Eyebrow.  It's this fancy little move he does, one eyebrow up, one eyebrow down, and if you're getting it, you've likely done or said something that's hit a nerve.  We used to get it often when we were growing up.  I really can't imagine why though, we were always on our best behavior and we would have never said anything sarcastic towards him! (Insert Dad giving me the eyebrow at this moment)

Anyway, we were eating lunch about a week or so ago, and Eva looks at me and says, "Momma, can you do your eyebrows like Pappy?"  I figured she was talking about, The Eyebrow, so I whipped out my best impression.  Evidently it was what she was looking for, because she giggled.  I preceded to tell her, that when Pappy would give us that look as kids, we would usually say something like, "Uh oh, Dad's giving you The Eyebrow." or "Watch out, you're getting The Eyebrow!"  She giggled again, and that was the end of the conversation.

Later that evening, Eva did something she wasn't supposed to do.  At this point I don't even remember what it was.  I know it wasn't a huge deal, but it needed to be addressed at the time.  As I was talking to her about it, she bursts into tears.  I can't figure out why she's crying.  She's been in trouble for much worse, and I know that I've been angrier before.  So I ask her, "Eva, what is wrong?"

"You hurt my feelings!" she wails.
"How did I hurt your feelings?"
Wailing even louder now, "YOU GAVE ME THE EYEBROW!"

I had to laugh.  It caught me so off guard.  I have practiced that look so many times, mostly trying to give Dad a hard time, and I've never really thought that I did that great a job of it.  I had no idea, that I did it without even trying!  Beware siblings, The Eyebrow is genetic!  When you least expect it, it'll attack! 
 
P.S. Love you, Dad.

Out of Practice

I've heard writing is something you need to do daily.  It doesn't matter if it's deep or insightful or boring.  It doesn't matter if it's the best thing you've ever written or the worst.  The point is to just write daily.  If you want your writing to improve, you have to practice, just like anything else. 

I've been missing practice!

I really do find writing therapeutic, I just have a hard time making a habit out of it.  Then, when I find myself most wanting/needing to, it's almost as if I've forgotten how.  Well, it's a new month.  I'm going to try to get in the habit.  We'll see.  Hopefully I'll post something else tomorrow, but you know me, there is a chance I won't  I'm thinking positive thoughts though so...I'll be back tomorrow!  Even if it is just to tell you what I wore!